


maybe it's the crazy that i'd miss

by methlabs



Category: L.A. Noire
Genre: Age Difference, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Dirty Talk, Drunken Confessions, F/M, Guilt, Miscommunication, Unconventional Relationship, kitty is a menace, mention of past dubcon so take care, roy is horrible, theyre perfect for each other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-11
Updated: 2020-08-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:01:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25842496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/methlabs/pseuds/methlabs
Summary: Roy gets a call at 2 in the morning.
Relationships: Roy Earle/Original Character(s), Roy Earle/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 11





	maybe it's the crazy that i'd miss

**Author's Note:**

> might insert this into a larger fic at some point but yall know im a big ol liar 😌✨
> 
> levi belongs to the lovely soupmetaphors

It was just his luck, Roy Earle thought as he lowered the whiskey glass from his lips, to get a call at such an ungodly hour. He glanced over at the clock to see that it was just coming up on 2 a.m. It wasn’t like he was going to sleep for another few hours anyway, but he’d still give an earful to whoever would listen the moment he got to the station.

Already cussing Colmyer out in his head, Roy rose to answer.

_“Hello?”_

Instead of the lieutenant, he was surprised to hear another familiar voice on the other end.

“Roy? Apologies for calling you at this hour—”

His face screwed up in disdain. “Then why the _fuck_ are you calling, Alfonse? I didn’t even come in today, can’t a man drink alone without being disturbed?”

“I’m sorry, Roy, but your girlfriend—she is very drunk. She asked that we call you to come get her.”

Roy would’ve spat out his drink if only he’d taken a sip. “My _what?_ ”

“Your girlfriend, Kitty? We normally have someone else on call for her already—a Mr. Levi Newfield—but she has requested we call you instead.”

“Christ,” Roy pinched the bridge of his nose. This was almost more of a bother than a new case. “Well, can’t you call him instead? I’m a little fucking preoccupied right now.”

“Trust me, I would, but Kitty has made it very clear she won’t leave with anyone besides you.”

He sighed exasperatedly, not caring if Alfonse heard him. That did sound like Kitty—difficult at all the worst times.

Roy knew that if he didn’t come to pick her up that Kitty really _was_ stubborn enough to stay the night. He also knew that if anything happened to her and Mickey found out Kitty had called him instead, the gangster would come down on him like a ton of bricks.

“ _Fine,_ ” he snapped. “Just make sure she doesn’t do anything stupid before I get there. _Ten minutes._ ”

“Of course. Apologies again, Roy.”

“Sure, I just expect my next visit to be on the house, _Alfonse_ .” Roy slammed the phone down on the receiver and ran his hand down his face. He knew how Kitty could get when she was drunk and he hoped to _god_ it wasn’t going to be a replay of the last time.

The detective shrugged on his suit jacket from earlier and grabbed his fedora, downing the rest of his whiskey before stepping out of the apartment. God knows he was going to need it.

The drive to the club wasn’t as unpleasant as Roy had expected: the streets were essentially empty, and the cold, early morning air had calmed him down considerably. He let his mind wander and his thoughts eventually drifted to Kitty.

They weren’t even an item—officially, at least—but judging from how much she’d hang off him whenever she was playing and he came for drinks, it made sense that the Blue Room staff would think otherwise. Against his will, an image of the two of them going steady flashed in Roy’s mind, and he quickly pushed the idea out of his head.

What the _hell_ was he thinking?

Kitty obviously saw him as a plaything—a young woman like her would eventually lose interest and move on. Older men, like himself, were never anything more than a rung on the ladder of a young woman’s pipe dream. And she, in turn, couldn’t be anything more than a potential—albeit difficult—lay for him. That was just the way things went. And that was the way this would go, too. He’d just have to learn to enjoy her obsession while it lasted.

The vivid light of the Blue Room sign was enough to snap Roy out of his thoughts, and he pulled into the parking lot rather sharply. Alfonse was already waiting at the door as he stepped out of the car.

“Where is she?”

“Thank god,” Alfonse sighed as he approached. “She’s sitting on the stage—”

Roy brushed past him impatiently and made his way inside. The club was all but empty, populated only by the remaining staff and a handful of stragglers finishing off their drinks for the night. He spotted Kitty’s petite, blue-clad form exactly where Alfonse said she’d be. She was lying down, her bottom half hanging off the stage as she kicked her legs into space.

“Hey,” he said as he approached, feeling too inconvenienced to expend any effort being suave. “I’m here, let’s go.”

Kitty instantly shot upright with a gasp, almost falling off the stage in the process.

“ _Royyy,_ ” She extended her arms to him with a lazy smile. He could see the alcohol in the colour of her cheeks. The sight was almost amusing. “You actually _showed._ ”

Despite himself, Roy moved close enough to let her grab his forearms. “Christ, how much have you had?”

“Mmmmm, does it matter?” She slurred, pulling him closer until he was standing between her legs at the edge of the stage, her skirt hiked up higher than he liked other people seeing. He looked around to catch some of the club’s occupants staring, but they all quickly averted their gaze. “You gonna take me home, Roy?”

“That’s what you called me here for,” he said, letting his tone betray some annoyance. “Come on, let’s get you out of here.”

“I can’t walk right,” Kitty giggled, and flopped back down onto the stage. “Bet you wish you did that to me, huh? Disgusting old man.”

Roy frowned but didn’t answer, instead picking her up and hoisting her onto his hip so that her legs were around his waist and her arms around his neck. He quickly decided this was a bad move as Kitty started giggling uncontrollably.

“You pervert, you couldn’t even wait until the _car!”_ she squealed, swatting his chest a little harder than he would’ve liked.

“Can you just _shut up_ for a minute while we get out of here? Do you want me to take you home or not?” They had already drawn more stares from the remaining patrons and Roy wanted to leave as soon as possible.

“Okay, okay,” Kitty pressed her face into Roy’s suit to stifle her giggles as he carried her through the club and past Alfonse, who opened the door for them. “Buh-bye, Alfie,” she said, giving the man a little wave over Roy’s shoulder.

“Stay safe please, Kitty,” he replied, looking on with a concerned expression as he closed the door behind them hesitantly.

As soon as they reached Roy’s Cadillac, he dumped Kitty unceremoniously into the back seat. She didn’t complain, though, stretching out against the black leather not unlike a cat. She only protested as he made her sit up and buckled her seatbelt for safe measure.

“You’re no fun,” she whined as Roy got behind the wheel and started the ignition. He looked at Kitty through the rear-view mirror to see that she was already fiddling with her seatbelt, but having no luck undoing it in her current state.

“That’s a new one, I’m normally the life of the party,” Roy said as he pulled out of the parking lot. “I guess there’s just something about being called out of the blue at two fucking a.m. in the morning that makes me sour,” he snapped.

Now that he had started, Roy couldn’t bring himself to stop the tirade that followed. “Those chumps think you’re my girl now, you know? How do you think that looks for you?”

“I told them that,” Kitty giggled, leaning forward so that she could drape her arms over his shoulders. Roy was half worried she would try to strangle him if he said something wrong now.

“You _what?”_

“I told them I was your girl. I like how it sounds,” she purred, pressing her nose against the back of his neck. Roy shivered, dangerous thoughts threatening to take root in his mind again.

He was too caught up to realise that Kitty had managed to unbuckle her seatbelt until it was too late.

“Hey, hey, hey—what the _fuck_ are you doing?” Roy panicked, trying to focus on the road while simultaneously wrestling with Kitty as she climbed over into the front seat.

She managed to fall into the seat next to him, mostly unscathed minus a bump to the head from the car door.

“Owie.”

“My god, I feel bad for Levi if this is normally what he has to put up with.”

Kitty looked offended, like he’d just touched on something too personal, and Roy immediately regretted it. Before she could open up on him verbally, he patted her knee.

“You all right?”

“... Yeah.” That seemed to placate her well enough and she sat mostly upright, kicking her shoes off and resting her feet on his lap.

They sat in silence and the cold air whipping past seemed to sober Kitty up a little. Eventually, she started dully rubbing her toes on his pant leg.

“Is this really the way to your place? It’s just like how I usually get home…”

Roy looked over at her incredulously. “I’m not taking you to _my_ place. Don’t tell me that’s—”

Kitty groaned loudly and sat up just as they came to a red light. She crawled over and threw her arms around his neck again, pressing her chest against his arm and forcing him to look at her. Her one permanently dilated pupil seemed even darker somehow and Roy was drawn to it.

“Do I just have to tell you to fuck me, Roy? Is that what I have to do? Because apparently making passes at you doesn’t _work_.”

Her bluntness caught him off guard. “Kitty—”

“ _Shut up._ I want you to take me back to your place—or my place, whatever you like—and fuck me until I can’t _talk_.”

Roy inhaled sharply as he looked away from her. He couldn’t remember a time he’d felt more conflicted. It wouldn’t have been the first time he’d gone home with a woman considerably more inebriated than himself. This was exactly what he’d been hoping for in the long term, but now? Now, it just felt… wrong.

Not to mention that if Kitty regretted it, she’d probably have her uncle’s goons castrate him by Sunday.

“I can’t,” Roy clenched his jaw, wishing more than anything that he could just accept her offer so they could get on with their lives separately and he’d never have to think about her again.

This was obviously not the answer Kitty was expecting.

“What?”

“I can’t, Kitty, you’re—” Roy frowned, his entire response foreign to his own ears. “You’re drunk. I can’t have you thinking I took advantage of you tomorrow.”

 _I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if you did,_ he stopped himself from saying.

Kitty was entirely taken aback by his response, pulling away from him and sitting back against the seat, her legs pulled up to his chest. Roy tried to convince himself that he preferred this to the entire Jewish mafia busting down his door in the morning, but her disappointed expression just made him frustrated.

Roy looked back at the road to see they had just missed a green light. He drove through anyway.

The rest of the drive was spent in relative silence, the only noise being from the radio, which Kitty had turned on at some point.

He wouldn’t admit it, but as they came to a halt outside the apartment building, Roy found himself wishing she lived further away.

He got out of the car, rounding to the passenger side and opening the door for Kitty. He extended a hand when she didn’t budge, which she took pensively.

“I’ll walk you up,” Roy offered, letting Kitty loop her arm through his. Thankfully, she had regained most of her ability to walk and they entered the foyer.

“Level 11,” Kitty said quietly as they approached the elevator. It opened immediately and they stepped in, Roy punching the number in quickly.

It was almost out of character how solemn Kitty was since his rejection of her advances, but her body language as she clung to him suggested otherwise. She seemed more preoccupied than anything.

They remained silent through the elevator ride and Roy’s mind screamed at him to say something as they approached Kitty’s door.

She fumbled with her key and Roy almost let her do it herself just to stall for more time until he realised she was trying to insert it upside down.

“Let me do that,” he said, taking it from her and unlocking the door himself.

“Oops,” Kitty smiled sheepishly, and Roy didn’t know he could feel so relieved.

Kitty stepped inside, but didn’t let go of her grip on Roy's arm as he was dragged into her apartment too. The whole thing felt uncomfortably domestic.

Kitty’s apartment was just as messy as he’d expected—the sheets of music scattered around the main room and articles of clothing thrown over furniture seemed very in-character.

 _“Herr Putz!”_ Kitty exclaimed as she fell to her knees on the plush rug in the entryway.

“Come again…?”

Roy’s questions were answered as the ugliest, fattest ginger cat he had ever seen materialised from somewhere and waddled over to greet its owner.

“Who’s my ugly boy? My ugly little goblin, I missed youuuuu!” Kitty exclaimed, letting the thing rub its face all over hers.

“ _That’s_ your cat?”

Kitty rolled over on her back to let Putz step on her stomach. “Mmhmm, isn’t he just the ugliest little man you’ve ever seen?”

Roy grimaced. “That’s one way of putting it.”

It was only now that Putz seemed to notice his presence and the thing _hissed._

“Awww, he _hates_ you! That’s my terrible baby,” Kitty squished the cat’s face between her hands before letting it run off into the apartment, presumably to be away from Roy.

He sure as hell didn’t like that cat already, but he was glad to see Kitty acting normal again. At least, her version of normal.

“I’ll be going now,” Roy gestured to the open door and tried to make his exit before Kitty forced him to make any more hard decisions, but she was already latching onto his leg like a ball and chain.

“Stay,” she said as he looked down at her, not a shred of anything but sincerity and desperation in her voice.

“What for? I’m positive your cat wants me dead anyway,” Roy joked, but Kitty wasn’t laughing.

She sat up on her knees, clinging to his pant leg like it was a lifeline. “I love you,” she slurred, looking almost on the verge of tears.

“You’re drunk,” Roy said without hesitation. Whether it was to her or as reassurance for himself, he wasn’t sure.

After shutting the door, he picked Kitty up again with little effort or resistance, letting her kick off her shoes before carrying her to where he guessed her bedroom was.

He placed her on the bed, softer than he’d done in the car, and pulled the messy sheets up around her. She grabbed his hand as he did so, bringing it up to her chest.

“Please stay, Roy,” she whispered, looking almost like a child afraid of a nightmare.

Roy felt something then—a sudden twinge in his chest as Kitty looked up at him pleadingly, and all the thoughts from earlier came rushing back.

He sighed resignedly.

“Fine.” He stood upright to remove his shoes before dressing down to only his dress shirt and pants, when he felt a small hand on his back.

“I’m still fully dressed, that’s not fair,” Kitty said from behind him and he turned to look at her, amused.

“Fine,” Roy said again, climbing into bed next to her. “But if I have to take these for dry cleaning, I’m sending you the bill.”

Kitty smiled giddily, immediately pressing her body against his, and Roy reflexively put his arms around her. Only now he realised just how small she was compared to him, and he admittedly liked it.

They simply laid still like that for a while, and Roy quickly felt himself dozing off with Kitty’s heat against him. She felt almost like a radiator.

In his last few thoughts of receding consciousness, Roy remembered vaguely the image of himself and Kitty, not unlike how they were currently, that had caused him so much anxiety earlier. He was stupid to be scared of something like this.

“Roy?” Kitty’s tired voice dragged him off the edge of sleep momentarily and he hummed in response.

“Do you want to go steady with me?”

He opened his eyes a little to see that Kitty still had hers closed, her face far more serene than he’d ever seen it.

“I’ll tell you in the morning,” he answered vaguely. As much as he wanted to say something more affirmative, if Kitty took back what she said, he’d have no back door.

“Do you really love me?” he asked in turn. It felt so strange to say, but not in a bad way. His ears burned but he was spurred on by the fact that Kitty probably wouldn’t remember this conversation tomorrow.

She smiled, keeping her eyes shut as she buried her face in his chest.

“I’ll tell you in the morning.”


End file.
